Dress sense

So, today my colleagues and I had an all-day meeting at the offices of a large marketing company that is doing some work for us. We were way too early and they have a rather nice café in their foyer so we all sat drinking coffee and catching up in e-mails.

I love watching people. I can do it for hours. I wonder who they are, where they have come from and whether they’re happy. Whatever comes to mind really. It was the start of the working day so there were lots of people coming and (not so much) going. You do see all sorts of odd things. The café is in a sort of atrium and the two or three floors of the building border on the atrium with a balcony. One woman had clearly left her pass behind. No problem – just call your friend who comes to the second floor balcony and drops her card over the edge. Problem solved!! Great security.

But as I watched some more I noticed something rather interesting. The women were all, to a woman, dressed well. Their hair was carefully coiffed, their shoes were lovely, they wore clothes that they had chosen with obvious care. The men on the other hand were – well – scruffy. Not quite to a man, but almost. Sneakers, jeans and t-shirts. Many hadn’t bothered to shave possibly because they think that two days’ stubble looks cool. I think that if I were a woman the last thing I would want to do would be to snuggle up to two days of stubble!

Maybe these men think old t-shirts and sneakers are cool office wear. Perhaps they’re trying to do the bohemian thing but I think that went out in the early 1960s. I couldn't quite work this out. Were the women completing with one another? They couldn’t possibly have been dressing to impress their male work colleagues who I suspect probably wouldn’t even have noticed the effort that they were making. I sort of worried (not a lot – it’s more that it crossed my mind) that these women were completing with one another. If they are then that’s a great shame.

At the end of the meeting, as we were leaving, I mentioned to J (their project manager of the work they’re doing for us) that I had noticed how well dressed the women were and how poorly dressed were the men. She commented that there was some discussion about whether it was OK for women to wear sneakers.

I couldn’t get this out of my mind as I travelled back home. What on earth is going on here? Are these women intimidated in some way to dress so beautifully? And is the cultural taboo on sneakers a consequence of that intimidation? How does this come about? I don’t know the answer to these questions. Maybe no one does.

But I ended up forming a view that the men were the problem here. The women were dressing presumably as they wished (possibly not) but the men just weren’t dressing at all. They were just scruffy and I ended up wondering if they really cared. Was there some male arrogance here that needs to be squashed out of my gender before the glass ceiling gets smashed?

Maybe I am an old fart. I am old fart. But I will be straightening up my act. It’s about respect I think – not so much to women (or at least one’s co-workers) but respect for the job you do, the difference you make and the value you place on your contribution.